Life Style

A Sex-Shaming Rant About Margaritas Accidentally Became the Song of the Summer

The early contender for the song of summer is a TikTok-fueled remix of a sexually explicit Evangelical sermon about margaritas.

Allow me to explain.

Earlier this spring, a 65-year-old Evangelical Christian named Cindy Smock — better known as Sister Cindy — gave a sermon on the campus of Louisiana State University. Smock’s performances have become wildly popular on TikTok, where she has amassed nearly half a million followers. (In this video, Smock says she’s “here to do some good old-fashioned slut-shaming.”)

On the LSU campus, Smock listed the sexual acts that a hypothetical promiscuous woman would perform as she drinks multiple margaritas. The crowd cheered and screamed along — most of them seemingly taking in Smock’s words as ironic performance art.

“If you buy her one margarita, she will spread her legs,” Smock shouted into the crowd. Subsequent margaritas were linked to increasingly explicit sexual acts, drawing enthusiastic cheers from the crowd. Think of it like an X-rated riff on the classic children’s book “If You Give a Moose a Muffin.”

The sermon went viral on TikTok, catching the attention of Angel Laketa Moore, a comedian and actor. “As I’m listening to it, I was like, I know what she’s trying to do and God bless her, but I was like, ‘this feels more like a rap,’” Moore told me.

So she turned it into one, flipping Smock’s original message on its head.

Moore’s lyrics grow in their explicitness with each additional margarita, describing sex acts you have almost certainly heard of that cannot be described here.

Artists Carl Dixon and Steve Terrell remixed Moore’s rap over a new beat and posted it on TikTok, eventually teaming up with Moore to create a longer version you can stream now. It is, obviously, not safe for work.

The song is a hit. Lizzo even posted a video. It really is very catchy! I have found myself on multiple occasions sitting at my cubicle muttering “gimme five margaritas” under my breath to no one in particular. Move over Jimmy Buffett!

“I think the beauty of a lot of female rappers is they take back possession of their sexuality and their need or want or desire for sex.” Moore said. “It’s not that you’re going to give me a margarita because you’re hoping I’m going to do this. I’m telling you, ‘give me a margarita and I’m a bless this thing open for you.’”

Smock, for her part, says her original sermon was an interpretation of Proverbs 20:1, warning “against the dangers of alcoholic beverages.” She has spent years preaching on college campuses, leading what she calls the “Ho No Mo Revolution.”

“The Bible is actually a very vulgar book in places, especially when God described sin,” Smock told me.

She also told me while she uses satire in her sermons, she isn’t joking around.

“Most people know that I’m for real, but the younger people on TikTok, they don’t get it,” she said.

Sister Cindy has also since come out with her own margarita song.

“She’s talking about drinking holy water. I’m trying to drink that liquor,” Moore said of the track. “I think there’s room for all of us.”

Here’s what else is happening online this week.

“Today marks the beginning of a new era for computing,” Tim Cook, Apple’s chief executive, said at the company’s Worldwide Developers Conference earlier this week. He was talking about the big-ticket item at the conference: the Vision Pro headset, which my colleague Vanessa Friedman wrote makes its wearer look like “a supercool couch slalom master from a land far, far away.”

But at $3,500, it will be a while before the Vision Pro changes the lives of most consumers. The announcement that will actually mark the beginning of a new era for the rest of us is the company’s overhaul of autocorrect, which will soon leverage a large language model similar to the one at the heart of ChatGPT.

Right now, autocorrect works by comparing one word at a time against a dictionary. But with iOS 17, which is expected to be released later this year, autocorrect will start considering entire sentences to determine whether the words make sense. It should also better respond to the flourishes in each user’s vocabulary — including the use of profanity, according to Apple’s Craig Federighi.

“In those moments where you just want to type a ducking word, well, the keyboard will learn it, too,” Federighi said at the event.

You can read more about the planned changes to autocorrect here (plus a fun look back at some of the most notorious flubs in autocorrect history).

We want to hear from you: What’s your worst autocorrect fail? Which word replacement drives you the craziest? Let us know at [email protected], and we may use your responses in a future newsletter.

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Mohammad SHiblu

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